I'm Going Back, Singapore

And I have a bunch of things I’m taking with me. My small, cheap luggage is now bursting with cheap clothes, canned goods, magazines, makeup, shoes that hurt, and more makeup. And I won’t be leaving you for quite some time, dear. This time, I’m staying longer.

I'll see you again, Sir Stamford.

I like you. I like how everything you have works like clockwork. I like how nice your people are, the ease I can go from one of your estates to another, and the fact that I don’t have to jostle and wrestle with other people just to get inside one of your buses. I like that most of your people don’t look at my scarred legs, that I can wear whatever I want, without anybody ogling me.

I’m also staying with you because I need a fresh start. I need to reinvent myself. 

I love my Flip friends. I will be back to missing them terribly. They’re still the best buddies anybody can ever have. They’re talented, fun, and irreverent. I’m glad to have them. But I had a good, long talk with one of them who made me realize that what would make my life fulfilling is when I open myself to struggles. Struggle you will give me.

As much as I am proud of being who I am, leaving my country (for the time being) is one of the best the decisions I will ever make. It’s a big world out there. I don’t want to spend my life vegetating in a little corner of the earth, waiting for the day to get a big break, something I can only get when I kiss ass. Because that’s the problem with my country: you’ll never get anywhere if you’re not a lapdog of the powers-that-be. It’s one big old boys’ (or girls’) club. It’s not going to change anytime soon.

That’s why I’m staying with you for a little while longer, Singapore, dear. I have high hopes for you. I know you will judge me for what I can do, and for what I’ll become, not for what you perceive my personality to be. I will not fail you. I’m prepared to work as hard as you want me to. But please, please, don’t fail me.