Joan and Annalyn

If you’re one of the very few people who read this blog, you’d probably think that my YES! years were all hunky dory. I mean, I really love my job. There is something inspiring about being surrounded by so many brilliant people in showbiz, and nothing beats the rush of seeing your name in print.

But there were also days when I felt lost, frustrated, and upset. The daily grind of work often took its toll. What kept me sane during those years were heart-to-heart talks with Joan, and later, Annalyn.

I met Joan during my application interview, and that early, I knew we were kindred souls. We went through the same highs and the same shitty lows. Whatever I felt during those first two years, she did as well. We thought we weren’t good enough, and that writing, as much as we love it, can be tortuous and pure hell. To cope, we would go to the cinemas (our office was housed inside a mall) and watch movies together until midnight, then go back to the office to log out, thereby completing our required 10.5 hours for the day. Yes, we're two little she-devils who sometimes loved breaking the rules.

Joanie eating a bag of Tomi in NYC.

You can just imagine how difficult it was for me to navigate the succeeding years without Joan, who, after a year and a half, left Manila for New York. I’m glad though that Annalyn came along. If Joan was my partner-in-crime, Annalyn acted the part of the level-headed older sister, who gave the sanest advice in moments of sheer insanity. She patiently listened to my woes, and even more patiently when I talked about all the men (and I mean all!) that I’m obsessing about. I’m also friends with the other YES! girls, but there are some things that I can only talk to her, like the alienation I sometimes feel in NTU, and how hard for somebody like me, who never fit in, to be perfectly square in Singapore. Mother Annalyn tries to sort things out for me, me who’s always unhinged and confused.

Annalyn and I at the office pantry, the site of our many "sessions."

I’ve always been the type who finds it hard to make new friends. I need time, and enough drama to bond well with somebody.  That's why I find it hard to let go of old friends, because it took me so much effort to build my relationships with them. I have to accept that I will never work with Annalyn or Joan—ever—and that while we may be still friends, I have to make new friends and hope  that those relationships would be as good as the ones I had with these two girls.

For now, I would just have to content myself with my frequent visits to Manila to see Annalyn and the rest of the YES! girls. And Joan, I know, I feel, that I’ll be in New York soon. I’m working on it. We’ll raise hell in NYC. I promise.

Curtis

After 13 weeks of intense studying (how intense it was, I can't even describe), I am finally done with school. It feels strange, not reading any of my notes. My friend N sums it aptly, "What do we do now?"

What I did was, I met up with a friend whom I haven't seen for months: Curtis. She and I met around 4 years ago, at work. While it took as quite some time to polish our writing, she was already writing a storm as soon as she set foot in the office. Not a single soul doubts her talent.

Curtis went to a bar and forgot to wear her shorts.

She also has an amazing knowledge of The Beatles, and their music. Never make the mistake of asking Curtis about The Beatles, or else you'll be forced to listen to her--for hours-- mouthing off every Beatles trivia she knows. I've learned a lot about The Beatles and rock music from her. In a way, I think I owe my current musical taste to this irreverent soul.

I think the best things that I learned from her though is that you have to learn how to be tough and how to face  your problems squarely, right on its face, without blinking. I thought that there were times when I was treated unfairly, but Curtis had it worse, and she handled her problems as best as she could. I'm a pretty tough kid, but I look like a wimp next to her.

Merry Christmas, Curt. Here's my gift to you. Enjoy!

Censorship Dinner

After being postponed, we finally had dinner with Cherian and Prof. Ang!

These professors were our teachers in our Censorship class, the module which has proven to be one of the most challenging during the semester. There were so many stuff to read, the paper was really tough to write... but everything paid off in the end. The class was intellectually-challenging and fulfilling, just the kind that I've always wanted to take.

Like a lot of things, my current interest in the issue of censorship was borne out of my years in YES! My editors were staunch anti-censorship activists, and I had the opportunity to write a couple of articles about censorship. Since then, I found the subject fascinating, which was the reason why I opted to stay in this class in spite of the long, scary list of readings.

Cherian and Prof. Ang made the class interesting and entertaining. These two guys are two of the most brilliant profs I've had, but they're so down-to-earth! Prof. Ang for example, is so open to listening to views that may be contrary to his. And he's so cool. His one-liners are the best, my favorite of which is, "Four floors of whores!"

Prof. Ang talking to LJ about a Shanghainese resto. Or at least that's what I heard. I asked Prof. Ang, "What's your weekend like?" Shaking his head, he said, "It's terrible! I wake up, I shower, I have breakfast, then I go for a walk. I have lunch. I take a nap. Then I have dinner. It's terrible."

I used to pooh-pooh Singapore's political issues. But Cherian's passion for teaching has made me somehow interested in the subject. He has this really interesting, funny way of discussing it, that even a foreigner like me soon found myself reading current affairs blogs to know more about the country that I've developed a lot of respect for.

Terrence (left) said, "Next semester is just going to be as shitty as this one." He turns to Cherian and asks, only half-jokingly, "Why do you have so many readings? Isn't one enough to prove your point?"

These guys are the best. I just wish I'll get a good grade from them. If that happens, I'll worship them until kingdom come.

After a month of studying for the exams and stress eating, here I am, with two of my favorite profs, Cherian George (center) and Ang Peng Hwa. I just wish I had enough time to put on makeup. Ugh. Oiliness is next to ugliness.

My Love Affair With White

After that exam that left me completely surprised (in a good way), I went off to Fair Price and Jurong Point (JP to us NTU students) to do some shopping.

Before I move on to important things, let me thank Terrence for unselfishly sharing us what he knows about statistics and numbers. Unfortunately--or fortunately--what he taught wasn't included in the exam. But still, I'm really grateful to this former banking and finance major for giving us some really much-needed tutorial. You know that guy in school who doesn't try hard but still aces his exams? That's the kind of dude Terrence is. While we mere mortals spend hours reading books, Terrence is the type who would enjoy the whole weekend chilling with his beloved daughter Kate and wonderful wife Dawn, but would walk in class, sit on an exam and get an A-- effortlessly. That's our dude, Major Terrence.

Anyway, as my usual practice, I rushed off to JP for some much-needed respite. I didn't want to stay behind and talk with the other students about the exam. What's done is done, and there's no way of changing it. Talking about the exam gets me antsy.

So I went to JP by myself-- I need some time alone-- and bought this really cute white top. I saw it last week when I went there to chill after an exam, and I liked it. But the cost, SGD 32, was a little turn off for me, a cheapskate, and I decided not to buy it.

But no! Days after, I'm still thinking about the top. And since it has been bothering me for a couple of days, I decided to get it. So here it is, all wrinkled and just out of the washing machine. I know it doesn't look that good in the picture, but it looks good when I wear it (hahahaha!). It shows off my curves (ahahahaha!). 

It's also available in black, but I've always liked white tops. I like how they can make you look sexy and decent (ahahaha!), and how it makes you feel cooler in the tropical climate. I first fell in love with white during my Summit stint, when I noticed that our good-looking art director would wear a white shirt everyday. And for some reason, that summer in good old Manila was really, terribly, hot. And it didn't help that our aircon in the Robinsons office was malfunctioning, dying in the middle of the afternoon, sputtering like an old motorboat before it would finally fall silent, making the whole office unbearably warm, and setting off my boss's blood pressure. Well, there were other reasons why her blood pressure went up. But that's another story. Ahahaha! 

Anyway, because of the heat, I decided to wear white more often. And maybe, out of habit, I now always buy stuff in white, whether in the middle of summer or, in this case, in spite Singapore's cool December breeze.

I'll wear this top on Thursday during our censorship dinner and our after sem party at Brewerkz. I'll blog about those parties later, but now, give me the space and time to swoon over my white top. :)

Now, if I can only iron those wrinkles away, everything would be perfect.

Sir Pete

So here I am, blogging again. There is something about reviewing for the finals that makes me want to write. I guess it's the tediousness of reading all those slides and handouts. Whew!

I promised myself that I'd write about better things, so for this one, I'd like to write about Pete Lacaba, my mentor, former copy editor, and, I'd like to believe, a friend. I first met Sir Pete as a student in UP. Back then, I wanted to be a screenwriter, which was why I signed up for his class. I'm sorry to say that while Sir is one of the best poets in the country (and that's according to another brilliant poet, Jose Wendell Capili), he's not exactly the best "classroom teacher." I love you, Sir! Peace!

I only got to learn a lot from Sir when I worked in YES! He's not the preachy, this-is-how-you-should-do-it type. He teaches by example, by asking really tough questions, and also by patiently answering the most inane questions. He never once made us feel small, he who is practically a giant in the Philippine literary scene.

In spite of his achievements, he's one of the most-to-earth fellows I've ever met. Once, I received a call from a journalist from GMA-7, asking me for Sir's complete name. I was simply flabbergasted. Here was this girl, a journalist from a respected organization, not knowing who Jose Lacaba is. Pissed, I slammed the phone right after I testily answered her question, and went up to Pete.

"Sir," I told him. "This girl, she's a journalist, but she doesn't even know your name!"

Pete saved whatever crap he was editing (we're mediocre writers, sorry), looked at me, and said, "Why? Does she have to?"

For a couple of seconds my mouth was just wide open. When I recovered, I said, "But she's a journalist. She should know. And you're effing Pete Lacaba, for crying out loud!"

Pete just looked at me for several seconds. Without a word, he just went back to work.

And that, is why I adore Pete. He taught me how to write. He also taught me that a man can be so good at his art and his profession and yet remain still so regular. It's no wonder that whenever he'd arrive in the office, all of us girls would give him the best hello's we can muster, in spite the exhaustion we sometimes feel. Because honestly, we worship the ground this man walks on.