Quickie

Once upon a time, in a Third World city, a girl had to pee. She told her colleague, one of the most beautiful men in the office, that she had to leave to go to the loo. In five minutes, she was back.

Man: That was quick!
Me: Yes, it's a quickie!

Har, har. Corny, I know. Bur I couldn't think of a good way to start this entry. This is going to be relatively short and sweet-- I need to wake up at 6:30 tomorrow, and it's almost 12 here. I just want to say how much I am grateful for everything that came my way-- the full scholarship that brought me here, the good jobs that are now proudly written on my CV, the demanding editors who brought out the best in me, the teachers who believed in my talent and intelligence, the friends--especially the ones I've made in college--who love me in spite (and sometimes because) of my flaws, and my parents who gave me the freedom to dream and chase what I wanted, no matter how unconventional or impossible it may first seem to be.

For once, I will not write about anything depressing, frustrating, or sad. I am grateful for tomorrow. Finally, I am crossing out one major goal in my lengthy list. And I'm crossing it out with a flourish.

Graduation, here I come.

 

Oranges

The campus is quieter than usual. Students have gone home for the Chinese New Year. The school is like a ghost town since last Friday, with many opting to skip classes-- something that I never thought these diligent students would ever do.


I spent Saturday with M, a friend and former colleague who has turned me to a J-pop and Jdorama addict. I like going to classes, I like learning new things, but without my Saturday sessions with M, I think I would have gone insane.


After watching animes, soap operas, and stuffing myself with Pinoy food, I took the train and waited patiently for the free shuttle bus that would take me inside NTU. Alas, even the bus drivers have gone on a holiday. I ended up taking the taxi instead.


As my usual practice, I engaged in a chat with the driver, who was about in his late 50's, as soon as I hopped in. I asked the driver why he was working during New Year's Eve. His answer: "I have to work. I have to pay my insurance. I'll spend it with my family tomorrow." 


In my country, this would have been considered tragic. Old people don't work--their kids are the ones who do it for them, which is why many leave the Philippines to slave their lives away in a foreign land. Some Singaporeans have been abandoned by their children. But others just refuse to be a complete burden. At first I thought working at an old age was tragic. It was later on I learned that in this culture, they view working--even in odd jobs-- as a way to keep their dignity intact.


Before leaving, I gave my Mandarin oranges to the happy and flustered driver. Those were gifts from M. I hope she won't mind me giving it away. And I hope the driver, in spite of his work, still had a great Chinese New Year.

Journalism and my place in it

I've been helping quite a bit with organizing the Asian Journalism Fellowship, an event that brings together for three months the region's finest journalists. The fellows will be staying here in Singapore, free accommodation and with monthly stipend, to attend workshops about the country's press, sightseeing, and working on their research projects.

Benedict of the Temasek Foundation (standing) tells us a story about farming, to explain why Temasek is supporting the fellowship. My super duper favorite, Prof. APH (second from left, wearing a blue shirt), had only this to say, "Corny story, Benedict!" Hahahaha! APH is such a big shot he can get away with making comments like that!

During the first orientation, the fellows introduced themselves and the kind of journalism they have done. Some are business journalists. One writes about cars. But the ones who have impressed me the most are those who write about human rights, political unrest--the nitty, gritty kind of journalism which I think I can never get involved in. See, while  I may have more education that is considered useful, I'm don't have enough guts and persistence to do investigative work. Guys like these have my utmost respect.

My work pales to theirs in comparison. I write mainly about entertainment and popular culture, with a little fashion and makeup mixed into the equation. While not as life-changing as other people's work, I still believe though that it still has a place in society. Like what another blogger, MC, said, what a boring world it would be if we all did the same type of job. What's more important is to have passion for one's job, and to do it ethically.

After school and achieving my nth diploma, I still plan to write about fashion, makeup, entertainment, and maybe even travel. These are what I live my life for. Maybe, someday, I'll write about politics. But at this point, I'd like to write about the beautiful things that life has to offer--even if some may think it's shallow.

Ice cream and Shoes

I want to write about something, but I can’t find that something.

I have a lot of things to write really, but not now. There is a time to write about those things. Maybe I can write them 6 months from now. Or maybe not. By that time it will no longer matter.

I still have a short story to finish. I’m almost done. But I’m scared of how it would come about.

I keep checking my e-mail, hoping that something interesting would come up. The most interesting mail I got was about a meeting next week with one of my favourite professors. That was it.

Maybe I should just eat ice cream, but as it happens, I already have fulfilled my ice cream quota for the day.

Maybe I should just buy shoes. That always worked for me in Manila. The higher, the better. It would hurt so much I will never get to wear it. Walking in heels in Singapore is akin to suicide.

I should go back to working on my presentation for Monday, but the topic is depressing—about people who pretend to peacefully co-exist but, behind that facade, there is potent rage brimming, the kind of sheer anger that would destroy their society.

Emo. That’s what my brother calls this. I can’t believe I’m doing and feeling it now.

PMS, that's how my girlfriends would label it. Hormones.

That’s it. I’m going to buy a pair of shoes from Charles and Keith. Saturday. I promise.

2010 List

I was supposed to post something about one of the best people I've met and whom I struck up a strange sorta friendship this year. I thought though that it deserves to be edited first--there were some things I wrote that may raise quite a lot of eyebrows.

Instead, I'm doing my own version of my friend Roan's annual list. Here's mine. You can check hers here.

  

What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
- study in a foreign country, e-mail a teacher random and crazy things :)

Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
- I didn't have resolutions for 2009. But I have a couple of goals for 2010.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
- None. We're a bunch of spinsters.

Did anyone close to you die?
- None, thank goodness.

What countries did you visit?
-Singapore, lah! :)

What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
-a major comeback in the magazine industry. I'm missing my passion.


 What was your biggest achievement of the year?
-Would you believe, the A- I got in censorship class? :) And impressing one of the profs with my writing.

What was your biggest failure?
-My mediocre grades in all of the rest of the modules.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
-Nothing big, just when I wounded my foot 11 hours before my first exam.

What was the best thing you bought?
-My laptop!

Whose behavior merited celebration?
-Everyone who helped after Ondoy--ditto!

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
-Politicians. Those responsible for the Maguindanao massacre-- ditto!

Where did most of your money go?
-I didn't spend as much as I used to. There's something about being unemployed that stops me!

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
-My Manila Christmas vacay.


What song(s) will always remind you of 2009?
- Don't Stop Believing.

Compared to this time last year, are you:

i.happier or sadder? -- sadder, sadly. hahaha!
ii. thinner or fatter? -- Fatter!
iii. richer or poorer? -- richer. ahahaha!

What do you wish you'd done more?
-exercise. spend more time with Singapore-based friends. read more fiction.

What do you wish you'd done less of?
-eating and studying.

How many one-night stands?
- none! :)

What was your favorite TV program?
-Glee, Project Runway Philippines, How I Met Your Mother, True Blood

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
-I dislike. I rarely hate.

What was the best book you read?
- Harry Potter. First time I read it was this year!

What did you want and get?
- To study abroad.

What was your favorite film of this year?
- The September Issue and Avatar. I now love Sam Worthington!

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
-28. I was stuck at home while Manila was recovering from Ondoy.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
-If I spent it seeing more of the Lion City instead of studying.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
-Jeans and sneakers. It will change in 2010.

What kept you sane?
-Music, writing, books, and writing. Always will.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
-Sam Worthington!

What political issue stirred you the most?
-the Ondoy related deaths, and how we could have prevented them.

Who did you miss?
-My Flip friends.

Who was the best new person you met?
-A lot. My classmates. There's one person I liked the most, but I'd rather not say who it was. My profs too.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
- Whatever happens, I'll be fine.

What was the nicest thing someone told you about yourself:
-There were two! 

"You don't have a boyfriend? That's strange. You're an atractive girl"--Nasrath. Ahahahaha! I'm such a sucker for that!
"You're an outstanding writer." Dr. Reimold

The most touching experience you've had this year?
-When Jeni helped me with my injured foot, and when one of the profs told me I'm one of his favorite writers.

What did you like most about yourself this year?
- That I did my best.

What did you hate most about yourself this year?
-I didn't exercise as much as I need. Now I have to lose 10 pounds!

Was 2009 a good year for you?
- Just okay.

What was your favorite moment of the year?
- Partying with the YES! peeps. I should have partied more when we were still together!

What was your least favorite moment of the year?
-the day I got my grades.

Where were you when 2009 began?
- Eating, lighting up and watching fireworks

Who were you with?
-family

Where will you be when 2009 ends?
-at home

Who will you be with when 2009 ends?
-family

Do you have a new years resolution for 2010?
- I have a bunch of goals.

What was your favorite month of 2009?
-December

Did you lose anybody close to you in 2009?
-none, thank goodness.

How many concerts did you see in 2009?
- None, dammit. Will make up for it this year.

Did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2009?
- Yeah. But nothing that made me roaring drunk.

Did a lot of drugs in 2009?
- none

You do anything you are ashamed of this year?
-None. Flirting with those guys was fun, fun, fun!

How much money did you spend in 2009?
- Just enough.

What was your proudest moment of 2009?
- Being told that I was a damn good writer. The insecurities are still there, but at least I'm feeling better.

What was your most embarrassing moment of 2009?
- none.

If you could go back in time to any moment of 2009 and change something, what would it be?
- None. What's done is done.

What are your plans for 2010?
- Exercise more, see more of my Flip friends in Singapore, strike up a deep friendship with somebody in school, read more fiction. live a more balanced life.

How are you different now that the year has ended?
- More realistic now.

What are your wishes for the new year?
- A great job, to lose the 10 pounds I recently gained, dress better, and, flirt with more boys. Ahahahahaha!

Warmth and appreciation, one word at a time

After weeks of thinking of what to give to my professors, I’m finally done with my shopping. I bought a couple of stuff in Singapore, and the rest here in Manila.

Several days ago, I suddenly thought that the gifts were a little too impersonal. I wanted to do something that would really show my appreciation, and tell these professors how much I’ve learned from them. So after attending a press conference, I went to the bookstore and bought these Christmas cards.

One more card and I'm done. 

As a child, I spent my allowance buying numerous Christmas cards for classmates, teachers, and friends. I’d just write “Dear ____, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Sincerely, Rachel.” That was it. Back then, I didn’t know how to write well, and I was never the type who would say something sensitive or emotional. Showing my appreciation to people was simply too corny for me, an angst-ridden kid who grew up during the grunge era.   

Recently, however, I’ve been finding myself writing a lot of sensitive stuff here in my blog. I wrote about my mentor and a couple of friends. There’s really something special about this Christmas season that has made me appreciate people more, and it has made me more willing to say it to them. Maybe because I now spend part of my time living abroad, or maybe because I’m just getting older.

Last night, I wrote in these cards to tell these people how thankful I am for everything I’ve learned from them. I know I’m now a pretty good writer, and that I can express myself more eloquently in writing. I stutter when I speak, and I say some things which, while my intentions may be pure, end up being misinterpreted instead. I learned this the hard way last semester. One day I’ll write about it. But not today. 

I need another one more card though. One card was supposed to be meant for a professor who praised my writing to high heavens, but during the process of writing on the card, I found myself writing to a female professor instead, thanking her for her infinite patience when we acted like fools in class. I’ll buy that card for him soon. I just wish I can think of something more to write, something beyond the “Thanks for being supportive of my writing” line. He made the first semester a little more enjoyable. I think he deserves a little more ass-kissing from me.

Joan and Annalyn

If you’re one of the very few people who read this blog, you’d probably think that my YES! years were all hunky dory. I mean, I really love my job. There is something inspiring about being surrounded by so many brilliant people in showbiz, and nothing beats the rush of seeing your name in print.

But there were also days when I felt lost, frustrated, and upset. The daily grind of work often took its toll. What kept me sane during those years were heart-to-heart talks with Joan, and later, Annalyn.

I met Joan during my application interview, and that early, I knew we were kindred souls. We went through the same highs and the same shitty lows. Whatever I felt during those first two years, she did as well. We thought we weren’t good enough, and that writing, as much as we love it, can be tortuous and pure hell. To cope, we would go to the cinemas (our office was housed inside a mall) and watch movies together until midnight, then go back to the office to log out, thereby completing our required 10.5 hours for the day. Yes, we're two little she-devils who sometimes loved breaking the rules.

Joanie eating a bag of Tomi in NYC.

You can just imagine how difficult it was for me to navigate the succeeding years without Joan, who, after a year and a half, left Manila for New York. I’m glad though that Annalyn came along. If Joan was my partner-in-crime, Annalyn acted the part of the level-headed older sister, who gave the sanest advice in moments of sheer insanity. She patiently listened to my woes, and even more patiently when I talked about all the men (and I mean all!) that I’m obsessing about. I’m also friends with the other YES! girls, but there are some things that I can only talk to her, like the alienation I sometimes feel in NTU, and how hard for somebody like me, who never fit in, to be perfectly square in Singapore. Mother Annalyn tries to sort things out for me, me who’s always unhinged and confused.

Annalyn and I at the office pantry, the site of our many "sessions."

I’ve always been the type who finds it hard to make new friends. I need time, and enough drama to bond well with somebody.  That's why I find it hard to let go of old friends, because it took me so much effort to build my relationships with them. I have to accept that I will never work with Annalyn or Joan—ever—and that while we may be still friends, I have to make new friends and hope  that those relationships would be as good as the ones I had with these two girls.

For now, I would just have to content myself with my frequent visits to Manila to see Annalyn and the rest of the YES! girls. And Joan, I know, I feel, that I’ll be in New York soon. I’m working on it. We’ll raise hell in NYC. I promise.

One Night at Changi

Budget airlines have the most interesting flight schedules. My flight out of the Lion City was at 6:30, which left me no choice but to camp out at Changi, or else I would have to pay more than SGD 50 for taxi fare. The airport was unbearably, numbingly cold, made colder by the fact that except for us Flips, there were very few people milling about.

Changi has some really interesting Christmas decor. Hmmm...

I spent the night reading a novel, and when that eventually bored me, I resorted to talking to one of the fellow Flip passengers from Darwin, Australia. Our conversation went like this:

Man: You should try working in Australia. You can end up being a PR.

Me: I prefer to work here though. Singaporeans are very nice. And you can also be a PR eventually.

Man: How much is the Singaporean dollars worth when you convert it to peso?

Me: SGD 1 to Php 32.

Man (a little arrogantly): Ah, the Australian dollar is worth a lot more.

By this time, I have a feeling the conversation is heading to dangerous territory.

Man: Are you single?

Me: Yeah. It’s very hard to leave your family behind just to study.

Man: Do you plan to go home and get married after this?

I looked at the man and thought, “Hell, no!” I did not leave my comfortable life in the Philippines, complete with maids, membership in a swanky gym, and a slew of weird, creative, and funny friends, to study in one of the toughest schools in Asia just to go home and get married after I’m done with it. But since I've lived in Singapore, I’ve learned to be nicer and be more patient. So I gave the man a sweet, bleary-eyed smile, and said, “No.”

Today's lucky number...13.

What is it about marriage that we Flips bring up the topic to people we’ve just met? Shortly before I left for school, I needed to get my insurance ID. There, I met a woman who had the temerity to tell me, “You’re 28, and still single?!” Yes. Is that a mortal sin?

What’s the big deal about being married? Is it that much fun? If it is, how come many of the married people I know (with the exception of magazine editor Frances Amper-Sales) end up looking like hell after only a couple of years of marriage?

And why do we Flips have this tendency to impose it on other people, especially to those who are so uninterested in it? As much as I love the Christmas season, I actually dread Christmas day itself. Christmas is the day when everybody—aunts, uncles, cousins, family friends, people who pretend to be related to us even if we don’t share the same DNA—troop to our house and badger me, “So, when are you getting married?

I am not anti-marriage. If my parents weren’t married, I would not have existed—although I have a feeling they were doing the deed a few weeks before their wedding. Sorry, Ma.

But what is it about Filipinos and our culture that puts marriage on a pedestal, as if it’s the greatest achievement anybody can ever have?  And why is it that whenever somebody’s single, people think of that person as some sort of a freak, a weirdo, some circus attraction? Shouldn’t it be the other way around, considering we live in a world where very few marriages stay intact?

Can somebody please explain to me, ha?

The other day, I was telling my mom that my next homecoming might be around 2011, because I have plans of working in Singapore after I am, hopefully, done with school in 2010. I told her I plan to look for a job in Singapore, try to work my way up and maybe become a fashion editor of a magazine, because I honestly believe that I can’t make that happen here in Manila. The city’s social-climbing, status-seeking crowd will make it impossible for me.

My mom, that sweet, kid-loving, nagging lady, smiled at me and said, “Oh. I thought you were about to say you were getting married.”   

Censorship Dinner

After being postponed, we finally had dinner with Cherian and Prof. Ang!

These professors were our teachers in our Censorship class, the module which has proven to be one of the most challenging during the semester. There were so many stuff to read, the paper was really tough to write... but everything paid off in the end. The class was intellectually-challenging and fulfilling, just the kind that I've always wanted to take.

Like a lot of things, my current interest in the issue of censorship was borne out of my years in YES! My editors were staunch anti-censorship activists, and I had the opportunity to write a couple of articles about censorship. Since then, I found the subject fascinating, which was the reason why I opted to stay in this class in spite of the long, scary list of readings.

Cherian and Prof. Ang made the class interesting and entertaining. These two guys are two of the most brilliant profs I've had, but they're so down-to-earth! Prof. Ang for example, is so open to listening to views that may be contrary to his. And he's so cool. His one-liners are the best, my favorite of which is, "Four floors of whores!"

Prof. Ang talking to LJ about a Shanghainese resto. Or at least that's what I heard. I asked Prof. Ang, "What's your weekend like?" Shaking his head, he said, "It's terrible! I wake up, I shower, I have breakfast, then I go for a walk. I have lunch. I take a nap. Then I have dinner. It's terrible."

I used to pooh-pooh Singapore's political issues. But Cherian's passion for teaching has made me somehow interested in the subject. He has this really interesting, funny way of discussing it, that even a foreigner like me soon found myself reading current affairs blogs to know more about the country that I've developed a lot of respect for.

Terrence (left) said, "Next semester is just going to be as shitty as this one." He turns to Cherian and asks, only half-jokingly, "Why do you have so many readings? Isn't one enough to prove your point?"

These guys are the best. I just wish I'll get a good grade from them. If that happens, I'll worship them until kingdom come.

After a month of studying for the exams and stress eating, here I am, with two of my favorite profs, Cherian George (center) and Ang Peng Hwa. I just wish I had enough time to put on makeup. Ugh. Oiliness is next to ugliness.

Deadma!

NTU is turning out to be far more demanding than I thought. I have 5 subjects this semester, which is pretty miniscule by UP/Philippine standards, but a killer by the standards of my current home. For each of the subjects, we would have to write a paper, in keeping with the tradition of NTU as a research university. This early, I’ve been planning how to write each paper/project, and have been trying to move heaven and earth to do the best that I can on each—which is really impossible.

And so, I decided to enlist the help of some friends. Many of them were very helpful, and are friends in the real sense of the word. Two though, are not. My messages to them were unanswered. I would have understood if I got the usual, lame, “I’m sorry but I can’t help you because I’m too busy taking care of my shit” excuse, but I didn’t even get any. And for that I’m really disappointed in these people. They suck big time. At one point or another, I have helped them in one way (especially the other one) and would have thought they would have at least the decency to send a reply. The other one though has been a disappointment since high school. I should have expected it, but I have turned into a Pollyanna lately that I forgot what kind of person she is. This may sound trivial to other people (especially to those who are currently working), but school is my world now, and by God, I will do my best to do well in it.

Oh, well. There are other ways of doing the paper. And there are other people who are willing to help. But I will never forget that I got the cold shoulder. In life, I avoid carrying anything heavy. Except, of course, if it’s a grudge. :)

Be Happy

I used to miss home. No make that, I used to really, desperately, miss home. I actually miss everything that I used to hate about the Philippines: getting stuck in EDSA’s traffic, the pollution, the noise. I miss going out at late at night and not worrying about how I’ll go home. I miss inane Pinoy movies. Heck, I actually miss watching Wowowee and Eat Bulaga!

I used to miss flirting with the Summit boys. I miss waking up in the morning and eating tapsilog. I miss my bedroom and my old, comfortable bed. I miss my books. I miss shopping like there’s no tomorrow.

I used to miss the rain. Joan’s right: there’s nothing like the Philippines’s rain. The way it pours: it’s straight out of the movies, as if the sky is mourning for a lost child. It was sweltering during the first two weeks I was here. Not a single drop of water was in sight.

I used to smile only if I think of Manila, and of my friends. My friends are the best. They know I’m not all sugar and spice. They know that I have one heck of a temper, that I can be your worst enemy, that I can be disagreeable, moody, and stubborn. But they’re still friends with me. They’re amazing people. I’m really lucky to have them.

I used to desperately, hopelessly, miss home. I...used...to. I have decided to stop. I snapped out of it when I told my friend about how homesick I was. His answer was this: “Don’t. Be happy wherever you are.”

Be happy. I used to think that happiness is tied to your environment. That it’s felt only when everything is perfect and complete: family, friends, a great job. But happiness, like what a former boss once told me, is also a decision. You can choose to be miserable. Or you can take the easier road and be content.

I still miss home. Yet this is not the desperate, hopeless degree of missing. I still miss the Summit boys. They’re still the hottest men I’ve ever met. I still miss my friends—nobody will know me as much as those guys do. I still miss tapsilog. But Argentina corned beef will do. I still miss my books and my bed. My readings will have to do-- for now. I still miss shopping in Galleria. Jurong Point is not a bad alternative.

I’m missing but doing better. In fact, I walked into tonight’s class smiling, prompting a classmate to say, “Rachel, you seem so happy today.” And I wasn’t thinking of home. I was smiling because of just some joke I heard.

I also think the rain helped. After two weeks, it finally rained. Not the melodramatic kind I’m used to, but it’s still what I have long been waiting for.

Tales from NTU

I'm baaack!

Hindi muna ako magsusulat in English. Nami-miss ko ng mag-Tagalog e. Nong binigyan nga ako ng saging ng roomate ko, nasabihan ko ba naman ng, "Sige!" with matching pa-tweetums facial expression. Nakalimutan ko, nasa SG pala ako. Two days na ako dito sa Singapore pero sawa na ako mag English.

Ang dami ko ngang nami-miss e: 'yong astig kong kumot, unan, kwarto sa Antipolo na laging nililinis ng mga maid namin; yong TV sa sala; ang manood ng CNN, The View, at The Buzz kung kelan ko gusto; ang kumain ng masarap at libre na luto ng maid namin; ang maid namin; ang ingay ng mga kapitbahay namin; yong mga taga-Summit at ang mga walang pinapatunguhan naming mga kwentuhan; yong mga damit na binili ko pa naman sa pagpunta dito pero hindi ko naman napagkasya sa bag. Dami.

Registration kanina, and for the first time, na-appreciate ko kulay ng passport ng Pinas. Well, yong dati. Green. Kasi siya lang yong green passport amidst the sea of red (China) and dark blue (India) passport na nagkalat sa auditorium. Wala akong nakitang ibang green. Sa akin lang. Kaya naman bago pa magpilipit ang dila ng Student Buddy sa pagtawag ng name ko, tumayo na ako and told her in my flawless American accent, "I'm Rachel." Chos!

May napansin lang ako don sa mga Indians. Di ba ang Pinoy, usually tuwang tuwa yan pag may nakitang kapwa Pinoy abroad? Yong matapobre hindi daw. Ako natutuwa ako, lalo na pag within campus (konti lang ata Pinoy dito). Pero yong mga Pana hindi sila nagpapansinan. E ang dami dami nila dito. Wala lang, I just find it strange.

Karamihan ng students dito either Chinese or Indian. Narealize ko, ang dami na ding mayaman sa kanila no? E ang Pinoy nakakarating lang dito pag libre.

Kanina nagchi-chichikahan kami ng roommate ko na Indian about the place we're from. And she told me that Mumbai is the best place to stay in because it's cosmopolitan. And she said that people there aren't very conservative. She asked me, "How is it living in the Philippines?" I said, "It's not as clean as Singapore. We're not as disciplined as the Singaporeans [read: pasaway kami, day!] But it's fun to live there." Later on, I said, "We're pretty conservative. If you were something like this [pointing to my signature cleavage top] you'll get a lot of cat calls."

And she said: "I thought it was fun to live there?"

Ah. What a complex topic, my country. It has its double standards, its corrupt politicians, its polluted streets, and its people who whine about their lives and blame the government for it but refuse to lift a finger to do anything about it. But it is the only place I know where I can be most comfortable, where I can speak a language that expresses my real soul and emotions, where laughter is a national sport, sex videos are for general consumption, where I can lead a life of comfort, and be around the people I love. And for most of us, that's what it is: Manila is love.

An idiot once asked, "What is there to love about Manila? About the Philippines?" Well, we do not love for any specific reason. Because that's what love is. You cannot rationalize it. It's just there.

Kaya pag may country-basher akong nakaka-usap (and most Pinoys are) I want to tell them: "You're just wasting your time. E, di umalis ka dito! Away with the nega vibes!" But I just do what a friend told me: Shut up and drive na lang ako!